Get your own
 diary at! contact me older entries newest entry
That's Edutainment!

2006-04-28 - 10:10 a.m.

Here at edumart (or edco I can't remember what twobagdogs calls it) it has become that magical time of year when we employ half of the unemployable people in San Antonio. That's right. It's temp season.

Watching the cream of the crop of the unemployable can be quite a spectacle. Being in the research science field of this business has led me to a few mathematical conclusions about this enigmatic season here at edumart. Allow me to summarize.

College Degree(King of the Hill Cast + Beverly Hillbillies Cast) = Excellent People Watching

You see, for the past few years we have employed people who, if they had money, would be labeled as 'excentric'. But you see, they have no money so I label them as 'Fucking Crazy'. These people come back year after year. I'm pretty sure that most of these people used to be teachers, and now they are supplementing their $100/ week pensions and stocking up on antipsychotic drugs. These people have made me quite certain that Ms. Tout , that bitter 65 year old English teacher I had, who told my 9th grade English class she was a virgin, is sitting at home wearing a shoe for as hat and naming all of her cooking utensils after the children she never had.

But I digress.

Allow me, if you will, to describe a few of my favorite temps from the last few years.

Ichabod Crane - This guy is at least 6'8", weighs about 95 pounds, 60 -70 years old, and wears plaid suits that are around 6 sizes to small. Oh, did I mention that I don't think he bathes?

Jeremiah Johnson - This one lives in a tent just off the premises of our campus. In San Antonio. In the Summer. In the heat. He showers in the emergency shower (for chemical burns) in our warehouse. Oh, and his computer is surrounded by small rocks that he has named. He calls them 'Spirits'.

The Enforcer - This woman has been known for not assigning work to new people. She then scolds them from doing anything but starring in a straight line - no talking, no reading, no writing, no nothing. Then when they eventually nod off...she fires them.

Crazy Cat Lady - All.

Smells like cheese guy - Most.

Most likely to be buried in a piano box - All.

They all generate that general vibe that is natures way of saying "Do not touch".

They have led me to one final conclusion:

Crazy + Education Certificate = Edutainment.

2 People felt the need for sassback


Stale - Fresh

YVAN EHT NIOJ! - 2006-08-10
That's Edutainment! - 2006-04-28
I hope this is on his college application - to Antioch - 2006-01-24
Lining the nightmare dream - 2005-12-21
The ultimate fuck you! - 2005-11-10

powered by


Stylin and Profilin! read other Diar
yLand diaries! recommend my diary to a friend! Get
 your own fun + free diary at!